LoonieTunes

This is probably a real late entry regarding this topic and I am sure not many will be interested to read about this depressing stuff in the first place but I think I need to write some stuff off my chest. It's been about a year since this misery started and we are right in the middle of it although it may not fee like it anymore. It sort of wandered to the back of our minds because it is just too depressing and we need to see some brighter days.

Last year this time we were hit by the big announcement of 28 staff leaving us after a good two month worry period. Having just entered the working world it was completely unexpected and to some extent I just thought it was unfair. I came to London to enjoy being a proffessional and finally be able to spend the money I earn and not live like a student any longer who turned every penny twice before speding it. Going out and enjoying life, go travelling and just being a bit carefee for a while. But no, life is never as you planned it and suddenly you are facing existence threating situations that make you dwell stuff that you thought were a good few years away. I saw myself doing the whole student thing again thinking twice before spending money and it was sickening after all I just started saving money and now I hadto consider that I might be spending it to survive a jobless period and would have lasted probably all of two month. It was upsetting!
I have to say or company tried to deal with it as openly as possible and they did a decent job in retrospect, we were informed enough to actually think and plan ahead. Comparing it to how other architectural companies dealt with it ...not: One of my mates came into the office one Friday to be told to be gone by Monday. Considering that until that moment they were told that things were okay..this is pretty heavy shit if you do not even get the time to consider other options.
Anyway, first time round you do not know what to expect and there is not formula on how to deal with the hidden psychological stresses. I didn't even know I was stressed. Yes I was worried sick but i was able to put it to the back of my mind just because my team has always been busy enough that there was no time in the office to dwell and whisper about it but to get our jobs done and put in some extra hours to show that you meant to stay. Our team wasn't the gossipy type either which probably helped helped a lot as well.
The day we were all sat down and talked to personally whether we were deemed useful for the company or not for me was a one big sigh of relief and a deep plunge into sadness at the same time. Yeah, I was thankful I got to stay and I went back to work, worked through lunch and stayed longer than usual out of thankfullness I guess, but I was so depressed on hearing who all had to leave and were not as lucky asme. This stretching thought of yes-no hits you right the moment they tell you, you are through.The whole situation reminds you of Pop Idol except that the jury wouldn't be sitting there choking on sobs....
I would miss some great work mates!
A month later my body thought it was time to show some of the anxiety I went through and my heart started going real weird, beating quite irregular and making me feel as if I was choking.I didn't make the connection at first. After all I still had a job and was back to some sort of routine, wasn't I? Well, apparently the stress release came later than expected. Got me real scared and had my ecg checked out, which didn't show anything unusual although my pulse was anything but normal - completely out of sync to say the least. But after the verdict of two doctors I had to accept that it was all stress related.
The second degree injuries you take away from the credit crunch. I knew that moment that from now on, that any major stress situations would include a bumpy heartbeat rhythm...thanks!

The second time around was about 6 month later when things didn't pick up as expected and another round of seat chopping was going to happen. This time we knew what was waiting for us as did my body and this whole unregular heartbeat things happened all over again - this time straight away. To add some extra spice for variation the whole second reduction had a bitter after taste from a pay cut idea that went horribly wrong and caused major outrage and hysterical group discussion. The only thing that kept me sane was praying! my family and to some extend my plan B - go to India and work there until things settled down again. Something I still want to do before settling down. This damn crisis was spreading like disease! If I was fired now, there was no more jobs out here in the UK. Going back to Germany was only minor option yes i could go back to my old boss and do some freelance work but finding a job that would actually pay my rent? That was the reason for going to the UK in the first place. I had the CV's and all set up and was waiting for DDAY 2 which provided the same sort of anxiety and my heart literally felt like it was going to explode like bomb when we were having our team lunch that Friday, had a hard time getting any food down.

So far no third time round has happened and I really hope it won't. But we are only one year into this recession and whereas the construction sector is always the one to be hit first and major cuts have already been made. It is now the cash flow that is causing all the trouble. Consumers do not invest in property therefore, contractors and housing associations do not sell or are able to re invest as planned, architects and engineers do not get enough work. Everything just slows down and everyone is trying to spike up the simmering with some below profit jobs just to keep it steaming. It will need another year for the market to recuperate to some sort of healthy state and until then we will need to live with further paycuts and just hang in there.
The painful thing is that the banks have seemed to pick up again and the media is feasting on this apparently positive news. The same goes for the german news that is gloating over the industry getting new jobs and is back to making profit. What a seriously bad joke. This is being told for so many years but never made an actual impact and common people's expense on goods.  The worst of it is that banks now are arguing on bonuses, which probably was one of the reasons why bankers started to be alot more ruthless and unconcerned when pushing trade markets and pushings loans onto people that in fact couldn't cope with it. Seriously they should be regulated and pay for the damage they have caused instead of getting a reward just to fall back into old patterns!

It is an unfair world but I guess I should be thankful, that I have a job with a company I like and that at the moment no one is dependent on my income other than myself. I am not routed to this place I could start anew if I needed to. It would be hard but not imaginable. Well, let's hope things will turn out for the better soon.

Ingredients
100g split red lentils
250ml water
100ml coconut milk
1 chopped tomato
2 small chopped onions
1 clove garlic
1/2 tsp tumeric powder
1/2 tsp cumin powder
1/2 tsp coriander powder
1/2 tsp cumin seeds
1/4 tsp onion seeds
1/2 green chili deseeded
curry leaves
salt
pepper
oil

Boil the water with the dal, tomato, 1 chopped onion, once the water boils reduce to simmering heat and cook for about 20 minutes.
Then add the coconut milk and keep simmering for another 10 minutes or so, till the dal is tender. Add a little bit of salt.

Meanwile heat another pan and add the onion seeds and cumin seeds and wait till the start popping add a tbsp oil or two.
Now add the chopped onions and garlic and sweat until they start to brown.
Add the chilli and salt and pepper, curry leaves
Add tumeric powder, coriander and cumin and don't forget to stir

Now add all this to the dal and stir till its well blended and serve with rice and pickles.
YUMM!

In the quest to save some money and thanks to the great inspirations of my singaporean domestic godess I have started to prepare my lunches for work at home. I still am more on the lazy side, so the only plausible reason I found is that I actually like cooking just as much as I enjoy baking. Although I never believed it since I was hardly experimental with cooking when I was in uni. Possibly due to the fact that I never had any time for it.
I still do not cook more than once or twice a week now. But it has got a lot more variety and I tend to try out a lot more different dishes that I thought I'd never accomplish like my mom's meen curry.

Though if you keep up with this for a couple of months you do run out of decent recipes. Coming from an Indian background the daily diet is a variety of veggie curry and italian/ german dishes. Some of these are hard work and I am still lazy. I do prefer one-pot dishes for lunch or those that do not require more than 2 sides, everything else get to complicated to take to work. Also, some of my mom's recipes are still a mystery and I cannot recreate the taste which leaves me to a fair few common indian dishes and the usual range of german/ italian food which at some points become boring. I just can't face eating the same things over and over again.

So recently I started looking into some cookbooks. The online versions are mostly only useful if you know what you know want to eat. I  need some inspiration! Images and Taste Ideas. Also I started to actually do something about loosing some weight. Yes, I know me who always said I will never be on a diet!
BUT I found a decent one that doesn't make me count calories and points and what not all else, I can still eat nearly everything I want except that I eat less of those things that make keep your kilos on! AND this diet thing tells me to do at least 30min of exercise ever day. Again yes, I know hardly believeable me doing exercise. But I found a decent way of coping with it. I now walk the 4 miles from work to home everyday in just about 40min, which is just as good enough I'd say!

Back to the food issue, this diet is named low GL diet and though based on some sort of points just makes sure you eat more slow energy releasing carbs and lots of proteins and "healthy" fat. (How I love this expression! There is the media telling you for years that fat is baaaad (which of course was never true) and now are desperate to keep some of its crediblety calling it healthy fat to ensure that people have a sensible diet.) What does it mean for me? Finding a new range of recipes to try out, lot of sweets in the form of fruits and the occasional chocolate and biscuit fix ( Nairn's ginger stem biscuits are phenomenal - if you are into ginger that is.) and of course it makes me loose weight, slowly but steadily, whilst I am not overly obsessed with it.

So I am adding some more of my new healthy findings on the recipe front. ENJOY...